“They are emotionless”

“They don’t care”

What we seem to not realise is what they go through.

They have the toughest, yet underrated task to overcome the fear of death, feel the way we feel, and are supposed to make our businesses theirs. However, if the unfortunate ever happens, they have no right to grief. Nurses find themselves in this frustrating situation for 8-12 hours each day, painstakingly turning bad moments into positive ones.

Today is Good Friday, when Christians commemorate the crucifixion of Jesus Christ. At 1:23am, a 3 year old child, Adoma was rushed to the Emergency Room. The little girl, who’d been diagnosed of Spinal Muscle Atrophy –  a genetic neuromuscular disease that causes muscles to become weak and waste away – a few weeks after birth, had lived knowing it won’t be long until she passes. Given her condition, the interventions needed to be be immediate, swift and delicate. Thanks to he nurses, little Adoma’s condition got better after an hour of resuscitation and stabilization. However, it won’t be long until her condition plummeted, again.

What was impressive? She had gone against the odds. Children born with this disease (Spinal Muscle Atrophy), most often than not, do not live beyond 2 years. She was strong, adorable and charming, seeing her in that state, was heartbreaking. For sure, we’ll all die one day, what we aren’t sure of is what happens with the people we live behind. “I just want her to live”, Adoma’s mother kept praying.

Care and interventions were going on well and as planned until that fateful hour. She’d deteriorated, she was struggling to breathe. Despite continuous oxygenation via oxygen masks, Adoma’s breathes were in gasps. It was only a matter of time. You could only watch life slip away through your fingers and beyond your control. At this moment, you efforts are not adequate no matter the lengths you go.

She was pronounced dead at 3:14am.

Now, the weight of the pressure lies on the shoulders of the nurses. They have to “get used” to the feeling, hide their tears and stay strong for everyone Adoma left behind. These nurses, cannot grief. For the new grads and students on the ward, this is trauma that’d leave a scar in the lives.